Joe & Charlie AA Speakers – Parts 6 & 7 – We Agnostics & How It Works – AA Big Book Workshop
Joe & Charlie break down “We Agnostics” and “How It Works” chapters. AA speakers explain finding your own conception of God, Step 2 belief, and the 12 Steps’ original direction versus what the fellowship changed.
Joe & Charlie, two of AA’s most respected Big Book teachers, walk through chapters 4 and 5 of the Big Book—”We Agnostics” and “How It Works.” In this AA speaker workshop, they tackle the core question: how does someone who struggles with the concept of God come to believe in a power greater than themselves? They break down the difference between belief and faith, explain why most people arrive in AA as agnostics rather than true believers, and reveal the actual history behind how the 12 Steps were written and then altered by the fellowship.
Joe & Charlie, renowned AA speakers, teach the “We Agnostics” and “How It Works” chapters, focusing on how newcomers without faith can develop belief in a Higher Power through Step 2 and Step 3. They explain that belief—not faith—is the starting point: you don’t need to understand God fully, only to be willing to believe in a power greater than yourself. The AA speakers also detail the original language Bill W. wrote for “How It Works,” the fellowship’s resistance to those absolute directions, and how Bill was forced to change “directions” to “suggestions” to gain acceptance for the Big Book.
Episode Summary
Joe & Charlie are among AA’s most trusted teachers of the Big Book, and in this workshop they dissect two of its most critical chapters: “We Agnostics” and “How It Works.” Their focus is on the spiritual and practical foundation of recovery—specifically, how someone who arrives at AA skeptical of God, religion, or spirituality can actually come to believe.
They begin by establishing that most people in AA start as agnostics, not atheists. An atheist denies God exists and has no power greater than themselves to turn to. An agnostic, by contrast, believes *some* kind of God exists but has never experienced God’s power in their life—so they don’t truly *know* it. Most of us, Joe & Charlie explain, arrive at the rooms believing in some kind of God intellectually, but we’ve been running our own show, standing on our own two feet, never turning to that power. We acted as if God didn’t exist.
The breakthrough of the “We Agnostics” chapter, they emphasize, is permission. One speaker shares how his sponsor told him to write down what he *wanted* God to be, casting aside everything he’d been taught about what he *had* to believe. That simple act—getting permission to have his own conception of God—shifted everything. He was freed from the suffocating doctrine that he had to believe exactly as others believed or face hell. The book teaches: your own conception, however inadequate, is sufficient. You don’t need to fully understand or comprehend God. You just need to be willing to open your mind and seek.
Joe & Charlie break down the critical distinction between belief and faith. Belief is the starting point. Faith comes later, after you’ve experienced results. They use a practical example: if a friend recommends a good mechanic and you’ve never been there before, you can’t have faith in that mechanic—you can only believe your friend. You take your car there, the mechanic does good work at a fair price, and then you *know*. The next time you need work done, you take it there on faith—based on knowledge. You can’t start with faith. Step 2 doesn’t say “came to have faith”—it says “came to believe.” That’s the doorway.
They then pivot to “How It Works,” diving into the original manuscript Bill W. wrote and the fierce battle that followed. Bill originally wrote this chapter with absolute, precise directions. He used language like “you must” and “you will,” giving clear-cut orders on how to work the steps. But when he presented it to the fellowship, especially the New York contingent who wanted nothing to do with God language, they fought him hard. They said it sounded too much like the Oxford Group absolutes. They said Bill didn’t have the right to tell people what they *had* to do. The fight nearly destroyed the fellowship.
Bill, stubborn as they come, initially refused to change it. He said those weren’t even his words—they came through prayer and meditation, so they were God’s words. The fellowship’s response was blunt: “We don’t care whose words they are. It’s *our* book, and you’re changing it.” Eventually, a non-alcoholic psychiatrist suggested a compromise: change “directions” to “suggestions,” change “you” to “we,” change “must” to “ought.” Bill reluctantly agreed, but only if he could finish the rest of the book without interference. The fellowship, not wanting to write the book themselves, agreed.
Joe & Charlie walk through the original language, then show where Bill actually put the sharp directions *back* into the book later on—creating some inconsistency in continuity, but preserving the real message for those who know to look for it.
They also explain the purpose of the first four chapters and the stories: they are designed to sell three ideas. First, that you are alcoholic and cannot manage your own life (Step 1). Second, that no human power can relieve your alcoholism (Step 2). Third, that God can and will (the rest of Step 2). If you’re not convinced of those three things, Bill says, you ought to reread the book or throw it away.
The speakers emphasize that Steps 1 and 2 are not *action* steps—they’re conclusions you draw based on information in the book. You’re not “working” steps 1 and 2; you’re reading, thinking, and coming to understand. Step 3 is where action begins: you make a decision to turn your will and your life over to the care and direction of God as you understand Him. A decision alone isn’t enough—it has to be followed by action (Steps 4-11). The decision is the cornerstone; the action is the structure.
They close by setting up the importance of understanding the basic instincts of life—social, security, and self-preservation—which Bill taught in the 12 & 12 as foundational to understanding why we do what we do, and why self-will always leads to collision with people, places, and things.
Notable Quotes
Much to our relief, we discovered we did not need to consider another’s conception of God. Our own conception, however inadequate, was sufficient to make the approach and affect the contact with him.
It’s in the seeking, not in the finding. All I had to do was seek.
You can’t start with faith. You can only start with belief.
The first time Columbus went back on belief. The second time he went back on faith. You can’t start with faith.
Half measures will avail you nothing. You stand at the turning point. Throw yourself under his protection and care with complete abandon.
A life run on self-will can hardly ever be a success. On that basis, we are almost always in collision with something or somebody.
These aren’t my words anyway. These are God’s words. They came after prayer and meditation.
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Full AA Speaker Transcript
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Welcome to Sober Sunrise, a podcast bringing you AA speaker meetings with stories of experience, strength, and hope from around the world. We bring you several new speakers weekly, so be sure to subscribe. If you'd like to help us remain self-supporting, please visit our website at sober-rise.com.
Whether you join us in the morning or at night, there's nothing better than a sober sunrise. We hope that you enjoy today's speaker. >> Thank God for chapter 4.
Let's look at just a little bit of it just before we go to lunch. >> You know, Dr. Jung told Roland that ideas, emotions, and attitudes, that's what we're going to be looking at now on.
Ideas, emotions, and attitudes, which were the guiding force of the lives of these people, are suddenly cast to one side. And certainly the ideas and emotions and attitudes that I had toward God were that of a seven or eight year old boy. I couldn't accept it then.
I couldn't accept it later and I couldn't accept it when I got here and I can't accept it today cuz I need new ideas and emotions and attitudes about this new information is what I'm trying to say. This chapter we agnostic. Just the word agnostic means something to me.
Gnostic means knowledge. You put the a in front of it means without. Those are us who are without knowledge and that was me.
And the knowledge that I did have was not good. And Bill had the same experiences that we did. When when Ebie presented him with a solution, he was a gasast at that solution.
Some of us are a gasast at that solution also. And Bill said that whenever they talked to to me of a god personal to me, he said my mind became irritated and snapped shut against such theories. And certainly that's the way that I did.
Later on in the book, it says to us that when the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out mentally and physically. The spiritual malady, the understanding of God of my understanding. When that is straightened out, we straighten out mentally and physically.
And this chapter here, we agnostic, is an attempt to do that. And as Father Bill Wilson, some of you know, Father Bill said to us many, many times, and I love it. He said that this chapter is not put here to teach me that there's any particular type of religion or type of god.
He said this chapter is simply put here so that I might read and question and wonder and get some ideas, emotions and attitudes, new ones and open up my mind to a point that God might prove to me there's a God. Now with that understanding of this chapter, it means more sakes makes more sense to me and becomes extremely valuable in my life. In the preceding chapters, you have learned something of alcoholism.
We hope we've made clear the distinction between the alcoholic and the non-alcoholic. If when you honestly want to, you can find that you cannot quit entirely >> because the obsession >> or if when drinking you have little control over the amount you take >> because of the allergy, >> you are probably alcoholic. God, isn't that simple?
Isn't that simple? You see how people like to expand on things? They took the two questions out of the big book and some years later they made a little pamphlet that had 10 questions in it and that wasn't enough.
They made another one that had 20 questions in it. Hell, I think we're up to 44 today, aren't we? >> Yeah.
Thank God, Bill or Abby didn't have the 44 questions with him when he walked into Bill's kitchen. He'd have said, "Bill, has alcohol been bothering your reputation?" hadn't had a reputation in years. Then he would said, "Bill, has alcohol been interfering with your sex life?" Is anything like I was?
He hadn't had any of that in a long time either. >> There's a statement in the 44 question. It says, "Do you drink alone?" Well, think about it.
If I'm buying, yes, and if you're buying, no. We had an old friend that used to live in Tyler, Texas. His name was Wino Joe.
I've always felt sorry for everybody in AA that didn't get to meet Wino Joe. He was a real character. He's dead now.
But Wo Joe had made up his own list to ask yourself to see if you're alcoholic. And the first question on his list was, "Has the roof of your mouth ever been sunburned >> while drinking? He said, "If it has, you probably alcoholic." I think the second question was, "Have you ever been arrested for drunk driving from the backseat of somebody else's car?" The third one I loved was, "Have you ever been arrested for public drunk while in jail?" He had a real list of them.
We only need these two. I use them all the time. People come to me today, they say, "Charlie, you think I might be alcoholic?" I say, "I have no idea.
Let me ask you a couple of questions. Have you been able to quit drinking entirely left on your own resources?" If they're a real alcoholic, they got to say no. And then I say, "Do you have any control over the amount you take after you've once started drinking?" If they got if they're real alcoholic, they got to say no.
And then I say, "Well, you're probably an alcoholic." That's about as simple as you can make it. Now, if that be the case, you may be suffering from an illness which only a spiritual experience will conquer. You know, we are very unique people.
We number amongst the few people in the world today who suffer from a two-fold illness that can only be overcome by a spiritual experience. We also number amongst a few people in the world today who have a terminal illness that we can come out of it in better shape than we were when we went into it. If we can have this spiritual experience, we are unique people.
Now to one who feels he's an atheist or agnostic, such an experience seems impossible. But to continue as he is means disaster, especially if he's an alcoholic of the hopeless variety. To be doomed to an alcoholic death, >> step one, >> or to live on a spiritual basis, >> step two, >> are not always easy alternatives to face.
But it isn't so difficult. About half our original fellowship were of exactly that type. At first, some of us tried to avoid the issue, hoping against hope we were not true alcoholics.
But after a while, we had to face the fact that we must find a spiritual basis of life or else. Perhaps it's going to be that way with you. But cheer up.
Something like half of us thought we were atheists or agnostics. And our experience shows that you need not be disconcerted. And I had to stop right here and and and see see what is my belief as far as this God thing is concerned.
And today we find there's only one of three ways that you can believe as far as God's concerned. One way is to be an atheist. Now an atheist says there is no God.
Therefore, they have no power greater than human power to turn to. The atheist would have to stand on their own two feet, run their own show. And I said, "Charlie, are you an atheist?" I said, "No." I've always believed in some kind of God, so I'm not an atheist.
I said, "Well, then maybe you're an agnostic." So, I had to go to the dictionary and look that word up. And like Joe said, the word agnostic means without knowledge. An agnostic believes that there is a God.
But since we've never tried to use God's power in our life, we've run our own show, stood on our own two feet, we've never received God's power. So we don't know that God exists. We believe in some kind of God, but we don't really know whether that's true or not.
And I think that's what most of us are when we get here. Most of us get here with some belief in a God, but we have never turned to that God. And we've been running our own show and standing our own two feet and doing our own thing.
Even though we believed in God, we acted as if we did not believe in them. An agnostic is one without knowledge of God, just belief. Now, if you're an atheist or an agnostic, then the question becomes, how do you become a true believer in God?
A true believer is one that knows that God exists. Don't believe it, knows it. A true believer is one who has experienced God's power in their life and God has given them whatever they need to have a successful life.
I don't think any of us get here as a true believer because if we knew God and experienced God's power then we wouldn't have to come to AA to solve our problem. Most of us come here as agnostics. Now whether we be atheist or agnostic the question becomes how do you get from that stage to the stage of one who is a true believer and can receive God's power in our life?
Page 45, first paragraph. Lack of power. That was our dilemma.
You know, if we wasn't powerless, we wouldn't be here, would we? Lack of power. That was our dilemma.
We had to find a power by which we could live. And it had to be a power greater than ourselves, obviously. But where and how were we to find this power?
Well, that's exactly what this book is about. Its main object is to enable you to find a power greater than yourself which will solve your problem. It doesn't say which will enable you to solve it or which help you solve it.
It says the main object is to enable you to find the power greater than yourself and then that power will solve the problem. And I find, interestingly enough, from page 45 on in the big book, Alcoholics Anonymous, we don't talk about alcohol anymore. We're through with that.
We talk about one thing and one thing only. If you are powerless, whether you be atheist or agnostic, if you are powerless, how do you find the power? And if you can find the power, then the power will solve the problem.
>> Okay, we're going to go to page 46 in chapter We agnostics. And the book says that yes, we of agnostic temperament have had these thoughts and experiences. Let us make haste to reassure you.
We found as soon as we were able to lay aside prejudice and express even a willingness to believe in a power greater than ourselves, we commenced to get results. Even though it was impossible for any of us to fully define or comprehend that power, which is God, much to our relief, we discovered we did not need to consider another another's conception of God. Our own conception, however inadequate, was sufficient to make the approach and affect the contact with him.
You know, my sponsor at that time, George, saw that I had a real problem with his idea about God. And he asked me about it, and I said, "Yes, I am. I'm having a hard time trying to understand." And he said, "I've noticed that." He said, "Why don't you do something that helped him and maybe it help would help me." He said, 'Wh don't you go home tonight and write down on a piece of paper what you would like God to be, laying aside all that stuff you think that you know and just write down on the piece of paper what you would like God to be.
And so I went home that night and I wrote down some things and I'm not going to tell you what it is and up to you. And I wrote down some things I wanted God to be and I showed him to George and he looked at him and he said, "Well, that's good, Joe." So you can begin with that. See, I didn't know you could do that.
And down in the south, you go to hell for making up your own god. True. You had to believe as they believed.
You had to have faith in what they hadn't faith in. If you didn't, you was going to go to hell. But George gave me permission and I needed that permission to sit down and to say, "I would like God to be these things." And he said, "That's good.
You can start with that and you can begin with that." And that's exactly what I did. For it says much to our relief, we discovered we did not need to consider another's conception of God. Our own conception, however inadequate, was sufficient to make the approach and effect of contact with him.
Now, here's where we can cast aside the first old idea. The old idea that I had was that you had to believe as they believed. And they had me convinced that if you didn't believe as they believe, there's no way that you're going to get anything good when it comes to God.
So, I was real pleased to find out that I can cast aside that old idea and then I can have my own conception of God. And like we said yesterday or last night, you know, I find that I've never had any problem with my own conception of anything. And you let me start believing in God the way I want to.
Then I've got an entirely different idea. An old idea cast aside, replaced with a new idea begins right here. >> Yeah.
And the book says, "As soon as we admitted the possible existence of a creative intelligence, a spirit of the universe underlying totality of things, we begin to be possessed of a new sense of power and direction, provided we took other simple steps. We found that God does not make two harder turns with those who seek him. To us, the realm of spirit is broad, roomy, all-incclusive, never exclusive or forbidding to to those who earnestly seek.
It is open, we believe, to all men. See, all I had to quit doing was saying no, there's not no. And start seeking.
Start saying yes, maybe. And I started seeking. I said, George, you mean I need to find God?
And he said, George, God's not lost. Didn't take me long to figure out who was lost. But I mean, he said, he said, it's just like the book says it's in the seeking.
It's not in the finding. All I had to do was seek. You know, and that's all this book is asking me to do in this chapter is asking me to seek with an open mind and to wonder and to think.
And eventually, God will disclose himself to me. And that's exactly what's happened. I was taught as a kid growing up that the way to God was a very narrow path.
That if you strayed off either side of it, you were going to get in a hell of a shape. I was taught that God was very, very exclusive, that only those that believed as they believed would be able to make any contact with God. Those were old ideas.
Now my book says we found that God does not make too hard terms with those who seek him. To us the realm of the spirit is broad, roomy, all inclusive, never exclusive or forbidding to those who earnestly seek. Old ideas cast aside, replaced with some new ideas, beginning to find this power greater than human power by changing of the old ideas to new ideas.
Page 47. So when therefore we speak to you of God, we mean your own conception of God. This applies too to other spiritual expressions which you find in this book.
Do not let any prejudice you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they mean to you. >> Prejudice is nothing more than old ideas. Do not let any old ideas you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they mean to you.
He said at the start this was all that we needed to commence spiritual growth to affect our first conscious relation with God as we understood him and then afterward we found ourselves accepting many things which then seemed entirely out of reach but that was growth but if we wish to grow we had to begin somewhere so we used our own conception however limited it was and that was a beginning for me I needed a beginning place and that's where I started now we need to ask ourselves but one short question do I now believe. >> The agnostic has always believed in some kind of God. >> Or am I even willing to believe?
>> The atheist can become willing to believe that there's some kind of God, >> that there's a power greater than myself. And as soon as a man can say that he does believe, >> the agnostic >> or is willing to believe >> the atheist, >> we emphatically assure him that he is on his way. It has been repeat repeatedly proven among us that upon a simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built and again the actists please be sure to read appendix 2 on spiritual experiences.
Again they want to make real sure that we understand what they mean by those terms. >> He said it's been repeatedly proven among us that upon this simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built. Asterk bottom of the page referring to the spiritual experience.
So the wonderfully effective spiritual structure we're building is the spiritual experience or the spiritual awakening. And he said the cornerstone of that is to believe or to be willing to believe that there's a power greater than human power. We referred to that once before.
The foundation of that structure was step one which is willingness. Now then he tells us the cornerstone of that structure. Step two, believing.
So, we've already put two stones in place if we can say we're willing and yes, we believe or we are willing to believe either one of the two. And he said that was great news for us for we had assumed we could not make use of spiritual principles unless we accepted many things on faith which seem difficult to believe. And there has always been one of my great problems with this God thing.
Faith indicates shity. Faith indicates knowledge. Faith indicates after the fact information.
And one of my problems has always been the minister would say, "Son, all you got to do is have faith and everything will be all right." Well, I never could have faith because I had no knowledge of God. I didn't know for sure that God would do anything for me. The best I can possibly do is to start with belief.
And there's a big difference between belief and faith. Believe me, there is. A good example of that, let's say I moved into this area here.
And three or four months later, I've got a problem with my automobile. I don't know a good mechanic anywhere in this area. But we'll say that you've lived here for a long time.
And I assume you'll know somebody. So I come to you and I say, "Can you recommend a good mechanic for me?" And you say, "Well, sure. Take your car over there to John.
He'll do you a good job and he'll charge you a reasonable price." Well, I don't know whether that's true or not. The best I can do with that information is if I believe it's strong enough, I'll take my car over there to John. And sure enough, he does a good job.
He charges me a reasonable price. When I leave there, I know that he will do that. When I went there, I believe that he would do that.
Now, 6 months from now, I have trouble with my car again. I don't ask you or anybody else where to take it. I take it right back to John.
This time, I took it on faith. Took it on knowledge. You can't start with faith.
You can only start with belief. And that's all we have to do. We either have to believe or we become willing to believe that there's a power greater than we are and we're on the road to spiritual recovery.
We don't have to know anything. Thank God. Step two says we came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
Didn't say we came to know. Didn't say we had faith in that. We just came to believe.
And I came to believe based upon what I've read in the book and what you told me that there's a power greater than I am can restore me to sanity. I didn't know that. I just believed that.
Now, if I know that the beginning of this thing, the finding of the power is just to believe or be willing to believe, then the next thing I'm going to have to know is what procedure am I going to follow in order to find that power? Let's go over to page 51 for just a moment. >> First paragraph.
It says, "This world of ours has made more material progress in the last century than all the millenniums which went before. Almost everyone knows the reasons. Students of ancient history tell us that the intellect of men in those days was equal to the best of today.
Yet in ancient times, material progress was painfully slow. The spirit of modern scientific inquiry, research, and invention was almost unknown. In the realm of the material, men's minds were fed by superstition, tradition, and all sorts of fixed ideas.
And I used to wonder why it is that that we today have cellular phones and TVs and automobiles and airplanes. And why those people 100 years or 200 years ago or 500 years ago didn't have or admit those things. They I thought we were just smarter than they were.
But come to find out, they had the same intellect that we did. Intellect means the capacity to learn. They had the same capacity to learn as we do.
But the only one thing that kept them in those dark ages, so to speak, it was superstition, tradition, and all sorts of fixed ideas. That's why I say I need an open mind more today than I'd ever needed an open mind. And I think we as a society have done that.
Right here in the northeast corner of the United States some 225 years ago or so, people came over here for religious freedom. They wanted to practice a religion as they saw, as they understood it. And as long as you agreed basically with their religion and you practice your religion somewhat like they did, you were okay.
But if you had any thoughts or ideas that were different and you expressed those thoughts and ideas openly and they didn't agree with what they had and what they agreed with, they would burn you at the stake as a witch. Right here in America, they did that. So if you had any ideas like that, you certainly didn't express them.
You kept them to yourself. So superstition, tradition and all sorts of fixed ideas kept people from growing and I think we as a country has gotten over that today. Our minds are open to many many things.
He said some of the contemporaries of Columbus thought around earth preposterous. You know I think Columbus is one of the greatest examples of what you can do based upon belief if you're willing to change your belief. Some 500 years ago, most of what they called the civilized world was situated around the shores of the Mediterranean Sea, the western shores of Europe.
They had found a place called the East Indies. And in the East Indies, you could get gold, silk, and spices, lots of goody goodies. But it took literally years to get to the East Indies.
So, they were trying to find a new trade route to the East Indies. And somebody said, "Is there any possibility that we could sail a ship there?" And they said, "Well, no, dummy. Don't you know you can only sail to the northeast end of the Mediterranean Sea?
And then you have to go by land, camel back, horseback, foot back, however they traveled." And that trick took literally years to do. And they said, "Well, what would happen if we sailed any other direction?" And they said, 'Well, idiot, don't you know if you sail out there, you're going to sail off the edge of this sucker? You see, everybody in those days thought the world was flat.
And they assumed if you sailed out there, you would sail off the edge of it. Now, I don't know why they believed that. I assumed some people sailed out there, didn't come back, and they thought they had sailed off the edge of it.
Now, Joe said the other day, "Wouldn't it be great if the world was flat? We could take all this environmental junk, just take it out there and go and push her overboard and be done with it. Now, here comes Columbus.
And we believe Columbus had to be an alcoholic because if you're going to believe differently than the world and everybody in it, and you're going to stand there and express that belief, you're going to have to be tougher in hell to do it. Because many times if you express a belief difference in whatever everybody else believes, they would burn you at the stake or hang you from a tree or cut your head off or something. And Columbus was tough enough and bullheaded enough to be able to stand there.
And he said, I believe that the world is round. I do not believe it's flat. What?
Then he made one of the most drunk statements the world has ever heard. He said, I believe we can get east by sailing west. Now, if that isn't drunk thinking, I don't know what is.
Many of his mannerisms indicated he's alcoholic. When he left, he didn't know where he was going. When he got there, he didn't know where he was.
When he got back, he didn't even know where he had been. But what really made him an alcoholic is a woman financed the whole trip for him. She did that twice.
Columbus followed a little formula. >> You want to write down these key words in in this formula? >> He followed a little formula that the world has always known that if you want to change anything at all, there are certain things that have to take place.
The first thing you have to do in order to change anything is to be willing to do so. Circumstances are what make us willing. trying to find the new trade route to the East Indies is what made him willing to change.
The second thing you have to do to change anything is to believe you can do so. You know, he said, "I believe that the world is round. It's not flat.
I believe you can get east by sailing west." But his belief didn't do him any good either because he's still standing on the shore of the ocean the day he expressed that belief. Some days, weeks, months, years later, he did the third thing. He made a decision.
He said, "By golly, I'm going to go find out whether this thing is round or flat. Can you really get east by sailing west?" But his decision didn't do me any good either. Cuz he's still standing on the shore of the ocean the day he expressed that decision.
Some days, weeks, months, years later, he did the next thing you have to do. He started taking action. And the first thing he did, he went to the king of Portugal to get the money.
But the king of Portugal being a very astute businessman said, "There's no way I'm going to let you have this money cuz you'll sail out there and sail right off the edge of this sucker and I'll lose it all." That's why he ended up with Queen Spain. Sweet talked her out of the money on the promise that he would bring back gold, silk, spices, and the goody goodies of life. She gave him the money.
He bought three ships. He put provisions in those three ships. He put crew members in those three ships.
And they began to go east by sailing west. Sailing west day after day after day. Now, we don't know for sure, but we have a suspicion that on that first trip, he hired a special sailor, put him on the bow of the lead ship at night with a lantern, whispered in his ear, said, "I believe this thing is round, but if you see the edge of this damn thing, you holler so we can get turned around in time." Now, after having sailing straight west for several days, they got results.
They found land on the other side which was the result of the action that they had taken. Now we know that he thought it was the East Indies. It wasn't.
It was the West Indies. But he had proven to himself the world is not flat. It is round.
You will not sail off the edge of it. Turned right around and came right back to Europe. Went right back to the Queen of Spain.
And she said, "Colus, where's the gold, silk, and spices you promised you would bring me?" And he said, "Sweetheart, I'm sorry, but I didn't find any." But he said, "Tell you what I'll do. If you'll refinance me, I'll go back. Trust me, honey, please.
>> And this time, I'll find it." And she refinanced him. And he got some more ships, more provisions, more crew members. They begin to go east by sailing west with one big difference.
The second trip, he didn't hire the special sailor. Put him on a bow of the lead ship at night. This time he went back on faith.
He went back on knowledge. The first time he went back on belief. You can't start with faith.
The only thing you can do is start with belief. Make the decision, take the action, get the results, and then you'll have faith. Now, I would love to sit here and tell you today, and the decision will do us no good unless we take the action.
And that's 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 and 11. As the result of the action, then we will get results too. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we are now we now have faith.
We now have knowledge. We no longer believe. You see, I don't believe today that God will restore me to sanity.
I know that he will because he has done so. Now those of us who have been restored to sanity and we have the faith then we can go back and help the next newcomer come to believe they can make a decision and we can take them by the hand and walk with them through the action steps. Then they will get results.
They'll have a spiritual awakening and then they'll know and then they can go help the next newcomer come to believe. Now there's only one thing you and I can't do for the newcomer. We cannot make them willing.
That's a job they have to work on themselves. Now, how does an alcoholic become willing to change? Very simple.
Drinking lots of whiskey. I hear people come to AA and they say, "I've been working on step one for three years in AA." And I said, "No, you haven't. You don't work on step one in AA.
You work on step one out there. And when you've drunk enough of that whiskey, you just can't stand it any longer. Then you become willing to change.
Then we can begin to help you by helping you come to believe, decide, act, and have a spiritual awakening. Same formula that the world has always used to change the status of anything. Now if I know I need the power and if I know the beginning of the finding of the power is just to believe.
If I know the procedure to follow to find the power, then I only need to know one more thing. Where am I going to find that power? And I think we get here just as confused about where God is as we were ever confused about anything else.
As a kid growing up, somewhere I got a picture in my mind. Now, I don't know whether I dreamed it or saw it. But in my mind, when I was thinking about God, he was a tall elderly gentleman stood on a cloud up in the sky, long flowing white robes on, long white hair, golden halo around his head, and sun rays shooting out of that halo and a big stick in his right hand.
Now, I don't know whether I saw that or whether I dreamed it. Well, one of the reasons I thought God was there is because every time the minister talked about God, he always pointed up there. So, I knew he had to be up there somewhere.
But then what really confused me, I know I noticed every time the minister wanted to talk to God, he always looked down here. He points up, "Hell, no wonder we get confused as kids about where God is." And I looked and I looked and I looked and I looked and I never could find God because I never did know where he was. And it took the big book Alcoholics Anonymous to tell me just exactly where I'm going to find him.
Page 55. You know, many years ago, I was working for or not working, but I was involved in a halfway house in Tulsa and I was heavily involved and there was this young man there who'd asked me to be a sponsor and he said, "Well, what do you think I ought to do?" I said, "Well, it'd be probably a good idea if you had a job, you know, to start somewhere here." And uh he said, "Well, easy for you to say, I don't have any car and I I can't get back and forth with no money. Can't even ride the bus." And I said, "Well, I'll take you around and help you find a job, and then if you find a job, I'll take you back and forth till you can get a couple of paychecks, and then you can buy a car or do whatever you need to do." He said, "Fine." So, I'm taking you back and forth to work.
And one morning, he told me a story that really helped me a lot. And he said, and this is the way the story goes. He said there was a three wise men of the east he said and they took from man the crown of life the thing that would make us the happiest and took it away from them and they said well now we took it away from him what are we going to do with it said well one of the guys said I'll tell you what we'll do we'll take it to the highest highest crevice on the face of the earth and the highest highest mountain and we'll hide it up there and he'll never be able to find it the other two said yeah but you know how they are they'll hunt and they'll search and they'll eventually find it the third one said I'll tell you what we'll take it to the deepest deepest crevice of the deepest ocean and hide it there and they'll never think about looking for it there.
He said, "Yeah, but you know how they are. They'll hunt and they'll search and they'll eventually find it." The third one said, "I'll tell you what we'll do. We'll hide it within himself and he'll never think about looking for it there." Page 55, first paragraph said, "Actually, we were fooling ourselves.
For deep down in every man, woman, and child is the fundamental idea of God. It may be obscured by calamity, by po, by worship of other things, but in some form or other, it is there. For faith in a power greater than ourselves and miraculous demonstrations of power in human lives are facts as old as man himself.
We finally saw that faith in some kind of a God was a part of our makeup just as much as the feeling we have for a friend. Sometimes we had to search fearlessly but he was there. He was as much a fact as we were.
We found the great reality deep down within us. And the last analysis is only there that he may be found. It was so with us.
So we can only clear the ground a bit. If our testimony helps sweep sweep away prejudice, enables you to think honestly, encourages you to search diligently within yourself, then if you wish, you can join us on the broad highway. Now, with this attitude, you cannot fail.
The consciousness of your belief is sure to come to you. A God of your own understanding is sure to come to you with an open mind. You know, it seems as though all human beings are born with some basic knowledge deep down inside themselves, probably lying at a subconscious level.
And that basic knowledge seems to be able to tell us what we should do and what we shouldn't do. Seems to be able to tell us how we should live and how we shouldn't live. And I'm sure a lot of people would like to refer to that as just plain old common sense.
I think others might want to call it innate intelligence. Some might want to call it the conscience and others might want to call it the soul. And I don't think it really makes any difference what we call it as long as we recognize the fact that it's there.
And if you're anything like I am, as far back as I can remember, I've always been aware of that knowledge. There used to be times I would be getting ready to do something and some voice somewhere from with inside me would say, "Charlie, I don't believe you ought to be doing this." And I wouldn't pay a bit of attention to it. I'd go right ahead and do it and I'd just get in one hell of a mess.
And that same little voice would say, "See, I told you not to do it in the first place." Now, if that's true and if that's God, then what that means to me today, if God dwells within me, then I've got my own personal God. I don't worry anymore about whether he's the God of the Baptist church or not. I don't worry whether he's the God of the Catholic Church, the Hebrew Hebrew religion, or anybody else's God.
If he dwells within me, then he's my own personal God. and he and I can come together in very simple, very understandable terms. This is one of the greatest pieces of information that I have ever learned is I can have my own God and he dwells within me and my knowledge comes from him and through him I'll be able to find that power.
Now then, am I ready to make a decision? You betcha. when he was a god of justice, when he was hellfire, and brimstone, I wasn't ready to make that decision.
But throughout this chapter, my concept of God has changed entirely. And I'm beginning to believe he just might be a kind and a loving God. And just maybe he'll start doing some good things for me, not hell, fire, and brimstone.
And now I'm ready to make a decision. And I don't think it's by accident that the very next chapter is entitled How It Works. And I think we get here just as confused about where God is as we were ever confused about anything else.
As a kid growing up, somewhere I got a picture in my mind. Now I don't know whether I dreamed it or saw it but in my mind when I was thinking about God he was a tall elderly gentleman stood on a cloud up in the sky long flowing white robes on long white hair golden halo around his head and sun rays shooting out of that halo and a big stick in his right hand. Now, I don't know whether I saw that or whether I dreamed it.
Well, one of the reasons I thought God was there is because every time the minister talked about God, he always pointed up there. So, I knew he had to be up there somewhere. But then what really confused me, I know I noticed every time the minister wanted to talk to God, he always looked down here.
He points up, "Hell, no wonder we get confused as kids about where God is." And I looked and I looked and I looked and I looked and I never could find God. because I never did know where he was. And it took the big book Alcoholics Anonymous to tell me just exactly where I'm going to find him.
Page 55. You know, many years ago I was working for not working, but I was involved in a halfway house in Tulsa and I was heavily involved and there was this young man there who'd asked me to be a sponsor and he said, "Well, what do you think I ought to do?" I said, "Well, it'd be probably a good idea if you had a job, you know, to start somewhere here." And uh he said, "Well, easy for you to say, 'I don't have any car and I I can't get back and forth with no money. Can't even ride the bus." And I said, "Well, I'll take you around and help you find a job.
And if you find a job, I'll take you back and forth till you can get a couple of paychecks and then you can buy a car or do whatever you need to do." He said, "Fine." So, I'm taking you back and forth to work. And one morning he told me a story that really helped me a lot. And he said, and this is the way the story goes.
He said there was the three wise men of the east, he said, and they took from man the crown of life, the thing that would make us the happiest and took it away from them. And they said, 'Well, now we took it away from him. What are we going to do with it?
Said, well, one of the guys said, I'll tell you what we'll do. We'll take it to the highest highest crevice on the face of the earth and the highest highest mountain and we'll hide it up there and he'll never be able to find it. The other two said, "Yeah, but you know how they are.
They'll hunt and they'll search and they'll eventually find it." The third one said, "I'll tell you what. will take it to the deepest deepest crevice of the deepest ocean and hide it there and they'll never think about looking for it there. He said, "Yeah, but you know how they are.
They'll hunt and they'll search and they'll eventually find it." The third one said, "I'll tell you what we'll do. We'll hide it within himself and he'll never think about looking for it there." >> Page 55, first paragraph said, "Actually, we were fooling ourselves. For deep down in every man, woman, and child is a fundamental idea of God.
It may be obscured by calamity, by po, by worship of other things, but in some form or other, it is there. For faith in a power greater than ourselves and miraculous demonstration of the power in human lives are facts as old as man himself. We finally saw that faith in some kind of a God was a part of our makeup, just as much as the feeling we have for a friend.
Sometimes we had to search fearlessly, but he was there. He was as much a fact as we were. We found the great reality deep down within us.
in the last analysis is only there that he may be found. It was so with us. So we can only clear the ground a bit.
If our testimony helps sleep sweep away prejudice, enables you to think honestly, encourages you to search diligently within yourself, then if you wish, you can join us on the broad highway. Now with this attitude, you cannot fail. The consciousness of your belief is sure to come to you.
A God of your own understanding is sure to come to you with an open mind. Now, it seems as though all human beings are born with some basic knowledge deep down inside themselves, probably lying at a subconscious level. And that basic knowledge seems to be able to tell us what we should do and what we shouldn't do.
Seems to be able to tell us how we should live and how we shouldn't live. And I'm sure a lot of people would like to refer to that as just plain old common sense. I think others might want to call it innate intelligence.
Some might want to call it the conscience and others might want to call it the soul. And I don't think it really makes any difference what we call it as long as we recognize the fact that it's there. And if you're anything like I am, as far back as I can remember, I've always been aware of that knowledge.
There used to be times I would be getting ready to do something and some voice somewhere from with inside me would say, "Charlie, I don't believe you ought to be doing this and I wouldn't pay a bit of attention to it." I'd go right ahead and do it and I'd just get in one hell of a mess and that same little voice would say, "See, I told you not to do it in the first place." Now, if that's true and if that's God, then what that means to me today, if God dwells within me, then I've got my own personal God. I don't worry anymore about whether he's the God of the Baptist church or not. I don't worry whether he's the God of the Catholic Church, the Hebrew Hebrew religion, or anybody else's God.
If he dwells within me, then he's my own personal God. and he and I can come together in very simple, very understandable terms. This is one of the greatest pieces of information that I have ever learned is I can have my own God and he dwells within me and my knowledge comes from him and through him I'll be able to find that power.
Now then, am I ready to make a decision? You betcha. when he was a god of justice, when he was hell, fire, and brimstone, I wasn't ready to make that decision.
But throughout this chapter, my concept of God has changed entirely, and I'm beginning to believe he just might be a kind and a loving God. And just maybe he'll start doing some good things for me, not hellfire, and brimstone. And now I'm ready to make a decision.
And I don't think it's by accident that the very next chapter is entitled how it works. >> You know, back on page 45, he said the main object of this book was to enable me to find a power greater than myself which would solve my problem. And Bill's going to sit down here now and he's going to write some of the best spiritual information the world's ever seen.
A little formula called the or proposals he called them, the 12 steps of alcoholic synonymous. And I can just see Bill there with with a problem that he has. You know, we've got Protestants in AA and we got Catholics in AA and we got Jewish people in AA.
We got a sprinkling of Muslims in AA. We got some Buddhists coming into NA at that time. And how are you going to write a set of steps or proposals that's not going to offend some of these people?
Quite a chore for a guy like Bill or anybody to tell you the truth. The Oxford groups were coming from first century Christianity. They had those four absolutes and they were really really strong.
They wouldn't give you any slack at all. They were more interested in the letter of the law rather than the spirit of the law. Bill was interested in the spirit of these things rather than the letter of them.
It's why it's a spiritual program. So, Bill had one gigantic uh problem here. Try to write these steps in order to in such a manner that wouldn't offend anybody.
And he accomplished that through the 12 steps of our college anonymous. These four absolutes that the Oxford group had said you were to practice absolute love, absolute purity, absolute honesty, absolute unselfishness. And these alcoholics were having a hell of a time being absolute anything except drunks, you know.
And they said, "Bill, we we we need to get rid of that kind of stuff." Also, they had made their own little steps, six of them, which came from the Oxford group tenants. And Bill could see loopholes in these steps that the alcoholic mind was slipping through. And he knew that they were going to have to have more strength and he knew they were going to have to be expanded, but he didn't know how far.
And in trying to satisfy that bunch, in trying to satisfy the people from all different religions, and in trying to satisfy those who didn't want God in here, Bill had a terrible time with it. By that time, AA had really divided into, you might say, three factions in Akran, where Dr. Bob was, they didn't have any problem with God.
Dr. Bob was a highly religious man. He used the Bible.
He insisted everybody he worked with use it too. God was no problem there. But the New York City people were an entirely different breed of cat.
They really didn't want anything to do with God if they could avoid it. They would have preferred a book dealing with the mind rather than spirituality period. And there was a finally a third faction that had said well let's talk about God but let's don't talk about him too much.
let's come down somewhere in the middle of this thing. So, Bill's trying to satisfy them all. And he said he tried and he tried and he tried and he tried to get started on chapter 5.
This is going to be the directions on how to recover. And he said I simply could not do it. And he said one night while in bed leaning against pillow behind his back, leaning against the headboard, pad and pencil in hand, trying to start chapter 5, he said, "I finally just gave up." and said, "I put down the pad and the pencil and said, "I prayed and asked God for help and direction." And he said, "I meditated for maybe 10 or 15 minutes." And he said, "Then after a while, I reached over and picked up the pad and pencil." And he said, "It felt as if the pencil had a mind of its own as it raced across the pages.
In less than 30 minutes, he had written how it works. one of the greatest pieces of spiritual information the world has ever seen. After he had written it, he went back and numbered these proposals and he found out there was 12.
He didn't set out to write 12. He went back and numbered them. There was 12 of them there.
Now, almost immediately after having done that, somebody knocked on the door. One of the guys in a New York City group had one of his sponses with him. They knew that Bill stayed up late working on the book anyhow.
So they had come by to see Bill on the way home. Bill could hardly wait to show this to this old older member. Look, look, look at the new 12 steps.
And the older member said, "What in the hell is this?" said G said said we only had 10 commandments and now you got 12 and he said six has been sufficient for everything up till now and he said I don't like it at all and the fight was on and they fought and they fought and Lois finally came in and gave him a cup of coffee and settled them down. Then Bill presented this how it works to the other members and that's when the crap really hit the fan. cuz they began to say to Bill, "This sounds too much like the Oxford group absolutes.
You're going to have to get some of that stuff out of there." And they said, "Bill, you're trying to give directions to people and you don't have the right to tell anybody what they have to do and build this and build that and build this and build that." And they almost destroyed not only the book project, but the little fellowship in its entirety. Now, Joe's going to read how it works from the original manuscript, which most of you have probably heard before. And if he reads through there, I think you'll be able to see the differences between what Bill wrote that night and what the fellowship forced him to change in order to have what we have today.
Let's go through it for just a moment and see the differences. >> Can you imagine what kind of fight you would have if you left here today, went back to your group, you had 12 sets when you left, but now you had 24. We had a little fighting going on, wouldn't it?
That's what Bill was up to. And here is how it works. The original manuscript, he said, "Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our directions, not our suggestions, our directions.
>> Those who do not recover or people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program. Usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such misfortunates.
They are not at fault. They seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a way of life which demands rigorous honesty.
Their chances are less than average. There are those too who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders. But many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest.
Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like, what happened, and what we're like now. Now, if you've decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any lengths to get it, then you are ready to follow directions. At some of these you may bulk.
You may think you can find an easier, softer way. We doubt if you can. With all the earnestnesses at our command, we beg of you to be fearless and thorough from their very start.
Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go. Absolutely. Remember that you are dealing with alcohol.
Cunning, baffling, powerful. Without help, it is too much for you. But there is one who has all power.
That one is God. You must find him now. Half measures will avail you nothing.
You stand at the turning point. Throw yourself under his protection care with complete abandon. Now we think you can take it.
Here are the steps we took which are suggested as your program of recovery. One, admitted that we were powerless over alcohol and that our lives had become unmanageable. Two, came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
Three, made a decision to turn our will and our lives over the care and direction of God as we understood him. >> Over to the care and direction of God as we understood him. Remember that.
We'll refer to it later on. >> Four, made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. Five, admitted to God and to ourselves and another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
Six, we're entirely willing that God remove all these defects of character. Seven, humbly on our knees, ask him to remove our shortcomings, holding nothing back. Eight, made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make complete amends to them all.
Nine, made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. 10, continue to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it. 11.
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our contact with God, praying only for knowledge of his will for us and the power to carry that out. 12. Having had a spiritual experience as a result of this course of action, we tried to carry this message to others, especially alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all of our affairs.
Now, you may exclaim, "What an order! I can't go through with it." Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles.
We're not saints. The point is that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines. The principles we've set down are guides to progress.
We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection. Now, our description of the alcoholic, >> that's the doctor's opinion, Bill's story, some of it in chapter 2 and three, >> the chapter to the agnostic, >> chapter 4, >> and our personal adventures before and after. >> Bill's story and those in the back of the book >> have been designed to sell you three pertinent ideas.
Well, Bill was a salesman, you know. A that you are alcoholic and cannot manage your own life. >> Step one.
>> B that probably no human power can relieve your alcoholism. >> Step two. >> C that God can and will.
Then the rest of step two. >> Now if you're not convinced on these vital issues, you ought to reread the book to this point or else just throw it away. Go ahead.
So you can see that Bill didn't he his intention was not just a set of suggestions. He was going to give real directions on how to work the steps and when to work the steps and going to give us precise, specifically clear-cut directions on how to do that. And he was very adamant about it.
But the crap hit the fan and they asked him and they made him through the argument to make some changes in this original how it works. And so today is how it works that we have in the book or the and the changes that was forced upon Bill, you know, and Bill said that he would compromise with him in in this area, but he asked he made a deal with them. And I can imagine through all the argument that they had up to this point back and forth of this this program, the kind of arguments they had, they were almost ready to disband and and ruin the little fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous at that time.
So Bill made a little compromise. He said, "I would I will from now on I'll make these changes, but from now on I will complete the rest of this book or else you can do it." Well, they didn't want to complete the rest of the book. They wanted Bill continue to do that.
So, they they agreed to let Bill continue to write the rest of the book without much interference on their part. >> You got no more seal bill when he wrote this and gave it to them. And they begin to fight and argue over it.
And they begin to tell him he's going to have to change it. And remember, Bill, stubborn and bullheaded just like the rest of us. And he said, "No, I'm not going to change this." And they said, "Well, Bill, you are.
Don't you remember? It's not your book. It's our book.
That's the deal we made to begin with." He said, "That doesn't make any difference." He said, "I'm not going to change this part of the book." And they said, "Well, you are going to change it." And he said, "What you guys don't realize is these aren't my words anyhow." He said, "These are God's words. They came after prayer and meditation and they said, "We don't give a damn whose words they are. It's our book and you're going to change it." And finally, finally, Bill realized that if he didn't compromise, they would destroy this project and maybe the whole fellowship.
And there was a non-alcoholic psychiatrist around in those days. And he made some suggestions. He said, "Why don't you change it from directions to suggestions, you'll still get your meeting across and probably more people would accept it." And he said, "Where you're saying you, you, you." He said, "Don't do that.
Don't tell them what they have to do. Change that to we say this is what we had to do and you'll get your message across and more people would probably accept it." And he said, "Where you're saying must must change that to ought ought and it will be more acceptable." Now, Bill very very reluctantly made those changes. Now, today we don't know.
If they hadn't made the changes, if they had left it like it was originally, maybe instead of 2 million worldwide, we might have 10 million. But also, if they hadn't made the changes, instead of 2 million worldwide, we might only have 10,000. Who knows?
Nobody knows. We just know this is the history behind this particular part of the book. Bill was cunning, baffling, and powerful.
Also, cuz he said, "Okay, I'm going to compromise with you, but you're going to have to compromise with me." And they said, "What do you want?" He said, "I'm tired. I fought with you all. I'm going to fight." He said, "If you want me to finish the book, then you give me the authority to do so.
and if you don't want to give me the authority, then you finish the book. Well, they didn't want to give him that authority, but they didn't want to finish the book either. So, they very reluctantly agreed to that.
Now, what Bill knew that they didn't know is two pages later, he's going to put directions and you and must right back in the book. He's had it in the book all the way up to how it works. they jerked it out and then he puts it back and that ruins some of the continuity of the book.
But now that we see what happened, it makes more sense. The other thing that is so apparent is when he says back here about the three pertinent ideas, if I can find it again, I don't trust my memory that good anymore. our description of the alcoholic, the chapter of the agnostic, and our personal adventures before and after have been designed to sell you three pertinent ideas.
He's talking about the doctor's opinion in the first four chapters and the stories in the back of the book. Now, if we've been sold on those three pertinent ideas, a that we're alcoholic and cannot manage our own life, then we're through with step one. If we've come to believe that no human power can relieve our alcoholism and that God can and will, then we're through with step two.
Now, the very next statement says, if you are convinced, you are now at step three. You see, the fallacy in trying to start somebody in in chapter five is it starts with step three. And it's hard to start with step three unless you've got one and two behind you.
People come to us today and they say, "Well, how do you work steps one and two?" And our answer is you don't. They are not working steps. There's no action involved here.
These are conclusions of the mind that we draw based upon information presented to us in the doctor's opinion in the first four chapters. I've always been powerless over alcohol. My life has been unmanageable because of that.
I just did not know that, nor did I know why. until I read the doctor's opinion in the first four chapters. There's always been a power greater than I am could restore me to sanity.
I just did not believe that he would, nor did I understand the insanity until I read the doctor's opinion in the first four chapters. Now, if I can say to myself today, you bet you I'm powerless over alcohol. My life is unmanageable.
I'm through with step one. If I can say to myself today, I I have come to believe there's a power greater than I am can restore me to sanity. I'm through with step two.
And now then I'm ready to look at step three. Now I might make a decision. >> Being convinced we were at step three.
We haven't took step three yet. We were just there. Which is that we decided to turn our will and our life over to God as we understood him.
Well, just what do we mean by that? And just what do we do? Well, that's a very good question, isn't it?
What does step three mean? Well, we're going to make a decision. That's part of it.
To do what? To turn our will and what is our will? Our will is our thinking.
And our life is our actions. We're going to carry make a decision to turn our will and our life over the care and direction. That's what the step used to say to God as we understand him.
Our will is our thinking. Our life is our actions. And we're going to make a decision to let God direct our thinking and direct our life in step three.
Haven't done that yet, but we're getting willing to do that. I've always heard a lot of people say one of the most misunderstood steps in the big book is step four. And I'll agree with that.
But I don't think step four is any more misunderstood than step three is. I hear people today say. I've been an AA about 5 years.
My life's still all screwed up. And I don't understand why because I turned it over to God three years ago when I took step three. No, we don't turn anything over to God in step three.
We make a decision to do something in step three. And the decision itself implies we're going to have to take some further action to carry it out. You know, one of the greatest examples I can think of is probably four, five, six years ago now, Barbara and I made a decision to come to Los Angeles, California, and visit some of our relatives.
But we didn't do anything to carry that decision out. And sure enough, we didn't get to Los Angeles that year either. Second year in a row, we made a decision to come to Los Angeles and visit our relatives.
Again, we didn't do anything to carry it out, and we didn't get to California either. Third year in a row, we made that decision. Only this time, it was a little different.
This time, I took the car down and had it serviced. Barbara packed the clothes and a little food and we got in our car and we drove from our home to Tulsa, Oklahoma. Then we drove to Oklahoma City.
Then we drove to Amarillo, Texas. Then we drove to Albuquerque, New Mexico. Then we drove to Flagstaff, Arizona.
Then we drove to Barstow, California. Then we drove to San Bernardino. And then we drove to Los Angeles.
And by golly, one day we ended up visiting our relatives in Los Angeles. Not because we made a decision, but because we took the action necessary to carry out that decision. Now, what is it we're deciding to do?
Well, we're making a decision to turn our will over to the care and direction of God as we understood him. What is our will? Well, our will is nothing more than our thinking apparatus.
Our will is nothing more than our mind. And our will is nothing more than this thing up here that tells us what to do and what not to do. You know, a good example of the word will, tying it together with mind.
And let's say that some of us are beginning to approach the end of our lives, which a few of us in here are, and we've gathered up a few material things, and we become concerned with what's going to happen to them when we pass on. We'll go down and sit down with an attorney and we'll tell that attorney what we want done with these things. I want this to be my spouses.
This is to go to my daughter. I want this to be my son and etc. Now that attorney will take my thinking coming from my mind that day.
Write it down in legal terms on a piece of paper. I'll sign it. The attorney will sign it.
And we'll put it in the safe. Now, a year or two or three later, sure enough, I kick the bucket. And if my family's like most of them, they're going to call the undertaker and say, "Come and get him.
Get him ready and let's get him out that cemetery about as soon as we can." And a couple of days later, they all gather out at the cemetery. They have me suspended over a hole in the ground. They're all standing around that hole.
Somebody says a few words and gives a little prayer. And I hope it's somebody from AA that does it. And when the ceremony's over, they start dropping me down in that hole.
Now, my family's like the rest of them. They're not going even going to wait till I get to the bottom of the hole. As soon as I start down, they jump in the car and they head for that attorney's office.
And that attorney gets out that piece of paper and reads to them what my thinking was two or three years prior to that time when I was sitting there in that office. We know they call that piece of paper a will. It's not by accident.
Will, thinking, mind are all synonymous. I'm making a decision to turn my thinking apparatus over to the care and direction of God as I understand him. Now, what else am I deciding to turn over?
Well, I'm deciding to turn my life over to the care and direction of God as I understand him. And what is my life? Well, my life is nothing more than my actions.
What I am right now as of this moment is the sum accumulative total of all the actions that I've taken throughout my entire lifetime has made me what I am today. All action is born in thought. >> Say that again, please.
>> All action is born in thought. Sometimes we react to a situation so fast, we think we do it automatically, but we don't. I can't even reach out and pick up this cup of water unless my mind tells my body to do so.
So if all action is born in thought, then it stands to reason my life is going to be determined by how I think. If my thinking is okay, chances are my actions will be okay. Chances are my life's going to be okay, too.
If my thinking is lousy, chances are the actions that I take will be lousy. And chances are I'm going to have a fouled up life, too. Now, when I got to this stage of the program, I went to my sponsor and I said, 'I don't think I'm going to be able to take step three.
And he said, 'Wh?' And I said, 'Because if I turn my will in my life over to the care of God as I understand him, I have no idea what he would have me be, and he may want me to be a missionary, and he may send me to China, and I sure as hell don't want to go there." And he just laughed. He said, 'Well, let's look at it this way. He said, 'At least it wouldn't be in the hands of an idiot, would it?
He said, 'Let look back through your lifetime. He said, you've always been a selfish, self centered, self-willed human being. You've always done what you want to do whenever you want to do it and the hell with the rest of them.
Is that right? And I said, well, you know it is. He said the end result of that is that you almost destroyed your life.
And he said just as importantly, you've almost destroyed the lives of those around you that care for you. He said, just think, if God could direct your thinking, it might become better. And he said, if your thinking becomes better, then your actions and your life's going to become better.
And he said just as importantly the lives of those around you that care for you would probably become better too. But he said Charlie left on your own resources. You're always going to do the same things you've always done.
You're going to remain restless, irritable, and discontented. You're going to stay filled with shame, fear, guilt, and remorse. And he said, "Sooner or later under those conditions, you're going to go back to drinking again." He said, ' If you don't find some way to be sober and have a little peace of mind, serenity, and happiness, you'll never have any longlasting sobriety.
And he said, you can't do that on self-will. And he got it through to me in such a manner that I was able to make the decision to turn my will, which is my thinking apparatus, and my life, which is my actions, over the care of God as I understood him. Absolutely amazing.
what has taken place since that time. Joe, >> you know, remember last night in the area of the uh forward to the first edition, they said that precisely specifically with clear-cut directions and you know, Bill wrote down those precise specific clear-cut directions on the original how it works, but they forced some changes on him. And when these changes come out and what we see in the in the book now, those are the changes that are made.
So, a little continuity of the book kind of got mixed up here. Bill's precise specifically and clear-cut directions were altered a little bit, but later on he puts them back in the book as we see. So, right here, by the way, as far as we know, we're the only species on Earth that's ever faced with this decision.
It seems as though all the other species on Earth don't have self-will. That whatever they do at any given time is always done on God's time, at God's direction. It seems as though we human beings are the only species that God gave this thing called self-will to.
Therefore, you see very few of the other species here on earth in trouble. I've never seen a tree hit a car yet. And one thing wrong with South is everybody's got one.
That's one of the things wrong with it. So, a book says and he gives us these little instructions here. Now, they're going to come short and sweet.
We have to be prepared to see them. And he says the first sequence tells us what to do first. The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life on our own self-will can hardly be a success.
On that basis, we are almost always in collision with something or somebody. Even though our motives are good, most people try to live by self-propulsion. Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show is forever trying to arrange the lights, the ballet, the scenery, and the rest of the players in his own way.
If his arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he wished, the show would be great. Everybody, including himself, would be pleased. Life would be wonderful.
Wouldn't that be nice if everybody would mind? They won't mind me. They just won't do it because they have self-will.
My will for my wife and my children is one thing. Their will and their life is another. They have a a self-will and their thoughts are different from mine.
sometimes and most of the times are in conflict and they just won't mind me. That's I know they'd be off a lot better off if they would but they won't. Now some 12 or 13 years after Bill wrote the big book and after many many years experience with some of the great teachers and minds in the world and after many many years with with experience with us alcoholics, Bill was forced to to write the 12 and 12 and he was really trying to push the the traditions on the fellowship.
He was hard selling the traditions to the fellowship and they weren't buying a lot of it but they needed the traditions and he knew that so he decided to write the traditions and he thought well I'll put some short stories or short essays about the steps in with the traditions and maybe if they will read the steps they'll eventually read the traditions. So he wrote the 12 and 12 for us. And the 12 and 12 again is just a short essays, short stories about the steps.
And it doesn't tell you how to work the steps. It just a short stories about the steps. The only piece of literature in AA that tells you how to work the steps is a big book about it anonymous.
But in the area of the fourth step in the 12 and 12, there was some some of the best information the world's ever seen on about self-will and what makes people tick. And it's called the basic instincts of life. And I always suggest the people that I that I sponsor that they go to the 12 and 12, read the first three or four pages about the basic instincts of life.
Get a working knowledge about the words that you see in there and then look them up in the dictionary because they're very important words. and we're going to use them a little later on in the third column when we get ready to do the four-step inventory. So, I needed a working knowledge of that information and Bill in his usual manner wrote some of the best information about the basic instincts of life and very very important information.
>> I think we have to face the fact that in 1937 38 and 39 when Bill was writing the big book, he was not a spiritual giant. He was not a great student of human nature. Bill was a night school lawyer, a New York City stock speculator.
Yet, he was able to write one of the most spiritual books the world has ever seen, dealing with human nature. Surely, surely, God took a hand in the writing of the big book and used Bill's hand to write the book. But by 1950 and 51 and 52, Bill knew a lot more about spirituality, a lot more about human nature, a lot more about we alcoholics than he did back in the 30s.
Studied with some of the greatest minds in the world for a period of years. And I think he felt that he had some new information that he could give us that would make it easier for us to work the steps according to the big book Alcoholics Anonymous. Basically, that's what he says in the 12 and 12 that the big book has always been the basic text and always will be.
You simply cannot work the program out of the 12 and 12. I see lots of people try it. But they can't do it because there's no directions on how to work the steps.
And I think that's why a lot of people love it. They can get in it and dance around and philosophize and they never have to do anything except talk. But there's some information in there that is absolutely invaluable that if we can see it and understand it and accept it, it makes the working of the steps out of the big book so much simpler and so much easier.
And these three basic instincts of life that Joe's talking about, he taught me in step four in the 12 and 12 more about what makes me tick and what makes me do the things I do and act the way I act. He taught me there more in two or three pages than I had learned in some 40 years of living at that time. Let's look at them for just a moment.
I think it'll be make it a lot easier to be able to see why we need to make our decision in three. Plus, it sets us up really with information for step four. Now, in your handout sheets, you've got a little picture in here about the middle in there somewhere.
I think it's page seven and eight in your handout material which says the basic instincts of life which create self. And he said, "All human beings are born with three basic instincts of life. They are God-given.
They're absolutely necessary for survival of the human race. Therefore, they are a good thing." The first thing he talked about is the social instinct. And he said, "All human beings are born with a desire to be liked, to be accepted, to be respected by other people." He said all human beings are born with a desire to come together in groups with other people and said if we didn't have those desires and cared nothing for each other that the world would go into complete anarchy dog eat dog situation would reign and eventually under those conditions the human race would fail to survive.
Now he used several terms under the social instinct. He uses the term companionship and that's nothing more than wanting to belong or to be accepted. So many of us grew up on the outside of the crowd looking in wanting to be and knew we could not be.
He uses the term prestige. That's wanting to be recognized or to be accepted as the leader of the group. And the world needs leaders.
You know, I guess somebody back in the old caveman days had to say, "John, get behind that tree with your spare, with your spear. Jack, you get over there with your club and Mary Joe and I'll run this sucker through here and we'll have something." Somebody got to do that. Most people will take one of two directions.
Either let me be a part of or let me be the leader of. In the other case, it's based upon what other people think of us. Self-esteem.
Self-esteem is what we think of ourselves. And that's usually high or low based upon what other people think of us or what we think other people think of us. If they seem to like us and accept us, we feel pretty good toward ourselves.
If it feels like they reject us and they don't want us, then we feel pretty lousy toward ourselves. Pride. And I'm glad I got into the habit of going to the dictionary.
I always thought pride was something you ought to have. All I ever wanted to be as a young boy growing up, I wanted to grow up to be a man who walked tall with pride and just a little bit sideways like John Wayne does until I looked it up in the dictionary and it says pride is an excessive and unjustified opinion of oneself. We either think too well of ourselves or too little of ourselves and in either case it's not the truth.
Personal relationships is our relations with other human beings in the world around us. Ambitions are the plans for the future to be liked, to be accepted and so on and so forth. All human beings have these things.
Now, if I want to be liked and accepted and respected by the world and the people in it, the first thing I've got to do is decide, well, what do they want from me? Society teaches us those things as we grow up. It'll vary in different parts of the world.
Well, one part of the world perhaps is a good education. Another part of the world is to be a large land owner. Another part of the world is to have a large family.
Any number of things based upon where we live in the world. And as we grow up and they teach us these things, then we ourselves set goals for oursel as to what we want to become in the future. And if we're going to reach the goals that we set for oursel, we're going to have to work at it.
You can't just be a bum and set on your duff and be successful and people like you and accept you. If it's a good education, you're going to have to work at it, whatever it might be. By the same token, we're going to have to make some sacrifices.
There are some things that I would really like to do as a human being that are very pleasurable and very exciting, but if you catch me at it, you're not going to like me at all. And I don't think you and I would do the work necessary to reach the goal. nor make the sacrifices necessary unless we get a reward for doing so.
And the great reward, Bill said it in his story when he said, "I had arrived." God, how many of us have done it? We've set that goal and we just literally worked our tails off for years and the day we reached the goal and they pat us on the back and they say, "Ah, Joe, you're a fine fella. You're a good man.
You're doing great." There's a feeling comes over us which is one of those indescribably wonderful feelings. Great great feeling. The only thing wrong with it seems to be just a temporary feeling.
No sooner do we reach the goal. We get the praise. We get the recognition.
We get the prestige from it and we look around. We say, "Well, is this all there is to it?" And we set another goal. And we work and we work and we strive and we strive and we sacrifice.
we reach the new goal and we get the praise and recognition feels great doesn't last long and we set another goal. It seems to create within we human beings an insatiable desire for more and more power, more and more recognition and we're not getting it fast enough and are not giving it to us the way we think they ought to. So what do we do about it?
Well, we start taking shortcuts. We start doing a little lying, a little conning, a little manipulating, a little stepping on other people's toes and climbing on their backs. In the instant we do so, we create pain and suffering for others.
They in turn retaliate against us and create pain and suffering for us. Playing that a life run on self-will can hardly ever be a success. Under those conditions, we'll always be in collision with people, places, and things.
Second basic instinct he talked about is the security instinct. Now, I know in AA we try to live one day at a time, but I also know just about everybody in this room's got an insurance policy. The purpose of the insurance policy is to protect ourselves in the future.
Bill said all human beings are born with the desire to be secure in the future. Said if we didn't have that desire, we wouldn't provide the food, the clothing, the shelter, the things that we need to survive and next winter we would just simply freeze to death or the next drought season we would starve to death. So this desire that we have to be secure in the future is a God-given thing and it is necessary for our survival.
Now once again, if you're going to be secure in the future, you have to decide, well, what is it that I need in order to be secure? Society usually teaches us those things as we grow up. And it varies in different parts of the world.
One part of the world, you only need $4. Another part of the world, you need 4,000. Another part of the world, maybe you need 4 million.
Another part of the world, you need 198 coconuts. whatever it is that they use to measure trade and barter with based upon what we're taught, we set goals for ourselves and we begin to work at it. Now, if you're going to be secure the future, you can't just sit on your your duff and be a bum.
You're going to have to work. You're going to have to make some money. You're going to have to invest it.
At the same time, you got to sacrifice. Hell, we can't blow it all today and be secure tomorrow. And I don't think you and I would do the work necessary to reach the goal or make the sacrifices necessary if we didn't get a reward for it.
Once again, the great reward is that great feeling that comes at the moment of successful completion of the goal. How many of us have done it? We set the goal for the new dress, for the new shoes, for the new suit, for the new drapes, for the new couch, for the new home, for the new car, for the new piece of property, for the new business.
And we work and we work and we strive and we strive. And the day that sucker is paid for and nobody can take it away from us, what a great great feeling that is. Hell, back when I was a kid, hardly anybody owned their own homes.
Once in a great while, somebody would buy a home and they would sacrifice everything they had to pay that sucker off. And the day they paid it off, the feeling was so great, they would call in the neighbors and we would have a great party and celebrate it by burning the mortgage. How great that was.
Only thing wrong with it is just a temporary feeling. No sooner got the sucker paid off and I looked around and his house is bigger than mine. >> Yeah.
And he's got a Cadillac and I'm driving a Chevrolet. And he's got a Brooks Brother suit and I bought mine at Kmart's. And that causes us to set another goal.
And we work and we work and we strive and we strive. We reach the new goal. Feels good.
Doesn't last long. We set another. seems to create an insatiable desire for more and more and more and more.
And we're not getting it fast enough. They're not giving it to us like we think they should. So what do we do?
We take shortcuts. We lie. We cheat.
We con. We manipulate. And the instant we do, we hurt other people.
They retaliate against us, creating pain and suffering for us. Plain little life run on self-will can hardly ever be a success. Third basic instinct he talks about is the sex instinct.
He said all human beings are born with a desire to have sex. Now it may get turned off by bad teachings or bad happenings but he said all human beings are born with a desire to have sex because if we don't have sex we can't reproduce ourselves. And if we don't reproduce ourselves sooner or later the human race is going to fail to survive.
So just like the other two, if you're going to reproduce yourself through the sexual act, you're going to have to work at it. Hell, you can do more work in 3 minutes of sex if you can last that long than you'll do all day digging a ditch. Don't you older fellas remember how it used to be when we got through with it?
My god, you just fall over sideways. The sweat's just pouring out of you. You hardly get your breath.
You feel like you've died, gone to heaven, come back two or three times. >> Gets excited, doesn't he? And I don't think you and I would do that kind of work if we didn't get a reward for doing so.
And the great reward is that great feeling we get both physically and emotionally at the moment of successful completion of the sex act. One of the greatest rewards that a human being can experience. But also just like the other two, it seems to be just a temporary feeling.
Hell, you no sooner get through with doing it than you get to thinking about doing it again. and it's such a pleasurable and exciting thing. The next thing you know, you get to thinking about doing it in different ways.
Then you get to thinking about doing it in different positions. Then you get to thinking about doing it with different people. And next thing you know, we're doing it the wrong time in the wrong way with the wrong people.
And the instant we do so, we create pain and suffering for others. They in turn retaliate against us, which creates pain and suffering for us. Yeah, it's plain that a life run on self-will can hardly ever be a success.
The fulfillment of these things are so pleasurable that all human beings from time to time will overdo in one or more of these areas and create pain and suffering for others. If you'll notice on that little chart, there's a circle called self. That's where self-will comes from, from these three basic instincts of life.
You also notice coming out of the self circle, there's one called wrongs, which is another word we need to look at. Somewhere we got the idea that wrongs meant a list of dirty, filthy, nasty items. But if you go to the dictionary and look it up, you'll find several definitions of it.
One definition of the word wrong is incorrect judgment of other people. A little later on, we're going to find out that's exactly what a resentment is. Another definition of the word wrong is incorrect believing.
A little later on, we're going to find out that's what most of our fears are. Another definition of the word wrong are the harms and the hurts that we do to other people. Now, it's easy to spot a selfish, self-centered human being.
One who's running on self-will, not running on God's will. A selfish, self-centered human being is always matter than hell. Damn him.
Damn her. By God, I'll show them. They're not going to treat me that way.
Blahy blahy blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. The selfish, self-centered human beings always scared to death. Can't depend on God.
Can't depend on other people. And if we're an alcoholic reaching the end of the road, we can't depend on ourselves any longer. And we're running absolutely scared to death all the time.
Selfie, self-centered human being. in order to fulfill the basic instincts of life are always overdoing and creating harms and hurts for others. Then we got to be scared to death of what they going to do when they catch us.
And even if they don't catch us, if God dwells within each of us, we know the difference between right and wrong and guilt and remorse associated with those things begin to eat us up. Now a person whose mind is filled with resentment, a person whose mind is filled with fear, a person whose mind is filled with guilt and remorse does not feel good. And eventually searching for a way to feel better, we begin to think about the sense of ease and comfort that comes at once by taking a couple of drinks.
Next thing you know, we believe we can drink and we end up drunk all over again. So, at the very least, we're going to have to do something about this selfish, self-centered human being. And it seems the way the only way you can do anything about that is through God's help because God made self-will.
And only God has the power to overcome that. The very least, we're going to have to do something about these resentments and these fears and these guilt and remorse in order to find the peace of mind, serenity, and happiness for good long-term sobriety. You know, if every human being in the world today could fulfill these three basic instincts at the level that God intends, there would be no conflict on earth today.
But all human beings have self-will. All human beings from time to time will overdo in one or more areas, creating conflict for others and for themselves. I never knew that.
I just knew I was always in trouble. I just knew I was always madder than hell. I just knew I was always scared to death.
I knew guilt and remorse was eating me up, but I didn't know where it came from. See, they gave me the rules, but they never taught me how to play the game. Aa taught me how to play the game.
And now that I know how to play the game, I don't break the rules anymore, and I don't hurt other people. And I'm not scared to death, and I'm not filled with guilt and remorse. This is the greatest information I have ever seen about what makes me tick and what causes me to do the things that I do.
Joe page 62 he said whatever our processations are most of us concerned with ourselves our resentments and our self-pity and it's not that I thought too well of myself or I thought too little of myself is that I thought of myself only that was my problem. So it said selfishness and self-centeredness that we think is the root of our troubles and we're driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-d delusion, self-seeking, self-pity. We step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate.
Sometimes they hurt us seemingly without provocation. But we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later put us in a position to be hurt. You know, alcoholism, I, self, and me.
You see, if you don't have a god in your life, and I didn't, there's only one thing left to live by, and that's the the satisfaction of these basic instincts of life. And I tried to live my life based upon those satisfaction of those basic instincts. And I overdid in many, many of those areas.
So, so our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They arise out of ourselves. And the alcoholic's extreme example of self-will run, though he usually doesn't think so.
Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must or it kills us. And God makes that possible.
Can't heal a sick mind with a sick mind. Only God makes that possible. And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of his getting rid of self without his aid.
Many of us have had moral and philosophical convictions of galore, but we could not live up to them even though we would like to. Neither we could could we reduce ourselves in much by wishing or trying on our own power. We had to have God's help.
Well, this is the how and why of it. See, he told us how it works. Then he told us why it won't work because of selfishness and self-centerness.
And now he's going to tell us how it really works. Well, this is the how and why of it. Tells us what to do first.
First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn't work. Everything I read leads me to believe this is a godded world.
Now, if it is a God-directed world, then those of us who have been self-directed and those of us who tried to direct everything and everybody out around us, we've been trying to do God's job for him. We're not God. We just been playing at being God.
And the book says we're going to have to quit doing that if we want any peace of mind, serenity, and happiness in the future. I think one of the great mistakes I see today in AA is people trying to force themselves to be better. >> And self-will cannot overcome self-will.
Only God can overcome self-will. So if we want any peace of mind, serenity, and happiness, it looks like we're going to have to turn to God and let him be the director. Let him do his job, which is direction.
>> Next, next direction. Next, we decided hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our director, >> not our suggesttor, our director. He's got his word back now.
From here on, it'll be directions. He said, "He is the principal. We are his agents.
He is the father and we are his children." He said, "Most good ideas are simple." And this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we would pass to freedom. And what is that idea? This concept that he is the principle and we are his agents.
He's a father and we're his children. He's a boss. I work for him.
Now, when I first got into this area, the of the third step, I used God like you would an errand boy. I said, "God, please help me to stay sober." And by the way, while you're at it, I help him get my wife back. >> Which one?
>> The the second one. I didn't want that first one back. That first one didn't drink.
She was mean and ugly. I like the one that drank. Where was I, Charlie?
>> God, get me a job. >> Oh, yeah. God, get me a job.
And by the way, pick up a little extra money for me. I need some money. I use God like you would an Aaron boy.
Send him out like that. And after I got sober, I got to reading in that other book, that other big big book. And in front of that book, there's a story about they said he he worked for six days and then he rested.
Now, to my knowledge, he didn't have to go back to work anymore. So, it look like there be any work being done around here. It's going to be me doing the work.
Said he's the principal, we're the agents. He's the father. We're the children.
He's the boss. I'm the employer. Most good ideas are simple.
And this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant hearts with which we pass the freedom. >> Now he's referring again to that wonderfully effective spiritual structure. Step one, willingness was the foundation.
Step two, believing was the cornerstone. Now he tells us what we're building. a triumphant arch through which we're going to pass to freedom.
And he said, "The keystone of that arch is a simple little idea that we're going to let God be the director." You know, in the old old days when they built arches, the stones were all stacked loosely without mortar. And they began to lean together and there was a center stone up here called the keystone. And if it was cut right, it would support the entire arch.
But if it wasn't, it would slip out and the arch would collapse. What a keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we're going to pass to freedom is this simple little idea that we're going to let God be the director. Now, for most of us, that's the first time we've ever had that idea.
Or if we once had it as children, we lost it somewhere. And instead of being letting God be the director, we were the director cuz we told God what we wanted. God, do this.
God, do that. God, give me this. God, give me that.
God, if you do that for me, I'll do that for you. And not only did we direct God, we directed everybody around us. Well, we're gonna quit doing that.
We're going to let God be the boss from this day on now. That is a radical idea for people like us. This is the decision that we're making.
Page 63 it says that when when sincerely took such a position the one just described all sorts of remarkable things followed said we had a new employer being all powerful he provided what we needed if we kept close to him and performed his work well say he's not going to do my work well I'm going to do his work well established on such a footing we became less and less interested in ourselves our little plans and designs more and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life See, I was always a taker and takers are losers in life. Contributors are those that win. I've noticed and said, "As we felt new power flow in, and as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, we became conscious of his presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow, or the hereafter.
We were reborn." You know, they used to come over my house on Monday night in that little church about two blocks from my house. And these guys wanted to talk to me about being reborn. And you know what I did for them?
I'm drinking. Man, it's Monday Night Football. You know, and they they they won't talk to me about reborn about 8:00 be knocking on and I'd run them off.
I said, "You guys get out of here. It's Monday Night Football. I don't want to talk to you.
Get And that's the way I did with those guys." And I didn't understand this reborn then at all. And I got to reading in that other book after I got sober. And there's a story in there.
This guy's name was Nicodemus. And Nicodemus was about like me, just dumber than the stump. Yeah.
And he asked that guy, said, "What do you mean by being reborn? Do you mean I've got to go back into my mother's womb?" See how dumb he was? And he looked at him and he shook his head and said, "Well, Nicodemus, don't you know you can't do that?
Didn't you go to the university? Aren't you educated? You can't do that." He said, "When I'm talking to you about being reborn, I'm talking about the renewing of your mind." Old ideas cast aside, new ones accepted, reborn in my mind.
I understood that then. And now I'm ready to do business. I'm ready to do the third step.
And I knew what they did on Sunday morning at that little church up there about 11:00. And I couldn't wait till I got there. And they basically asked people to come down there and do the third step prayer, what they do.
So I waited till next Sunday. I got there about 3 or 4 minutes till 11:00. Well, I didn't want to get there too early.
I might hear something that would help me. So I got there about 3 or 4 minutes to 11 and sure enough they asked people to do that and I came down there and I did this. It said the book said we were now at step three.
Said many of us said to our makers we understood him. God off myself to you to build with me and to do with me as you will. take away my difficulties that victory over them may bear witness that I would bear witness to those that I would help of your power, your love, and your way of life.
May I do your will always. He said, we thought well before taking this tech, making sure that we were ready, that we could at last abandoned ourselves utterly to him. And I don't know what exactly happened that particular morning, but I do know this.
From that Sunday morning until this moment, my life hasn't been the same. It's as if I'd been walking on the dark side of the street all those years and all of a sudden I'm on the sunny side of the street and I don't know what happened except I do know that my life has changed. Thank God.
We thought well before taking this step making sure we were ready that we could at last abandon ourselves utterly to him. I think the word utterly means completely wholeheartedly all the way the entire ball of wax. I hope you don't make the mistake I did.
First time I took step three, I got on my knees, which I very seldom did in those days. And I said, "God, I offer myself to thee to build with me and do with me as thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage yourself that I may better do that will take away my difficulties." So on so on so forth.
And as I finished it up, I said, "Now this applies to my alcohol. Don't fool with my sex life. Stay out of my money.
I can handle that, too. God probably said, "What an order? I can't go through with it." I said, "You take the alcohol and I'll take care of the rest." Well, today I realize the fallacy in that is, as far as I know, God doesn't even drink.
He don't want the alcohol. He wants me and he wants all of me. Just think if God could direct my thinking in all areas, it might even become better in my sex life.
It might even become better in my money areas. It might even become better in all areas. And if my thinking becomes better in all areas, then surely my life will become better in all areas too.
I think we need to realize this is really the decision we're making to turn our entire will and our entire life over to the care and direction of God as we understand him. We found it very desirable to take this spiritual step with an understanding person such as our wife, best friend or spiritual adviser. You know back in the beginning there was never any question about this.
The new person was expected to take this step in the company of other human beings. The first step in the Oxford group tenants was surrender. And when a new person got ready to surrender, they would take them upstairs in Dr.
Bob's house. Three or four of the older members, they would all get down on their knees. The new person would make his surrender.
Then after he was through, the older members would vote on how well he surrendered. If he didn't do it good enough, he'd probably have to do it again later on. I think there's a valid reason behind this.
Uh, you know, I'm told that we alcoholics are born to live in three dimensions. We're born to live with God and ourselves and our fellow human beings. And if we are praying with other human beings for the first time, we're beginning to fit ourselves back together in all three dimensions the way God intended in the first place.
We alcoholics are the funniest people in the world. You know, we'll let our family see us on our knees in the bathroom, hugging the porcelain bowl, puking our guts up morning after morning after morning. We come to AA and we try to straighten out our lives and we're ashamed and embarrassed and let's see people see us pray.
Isn't that something? Praying in the company of other human beings is always better. Anybody I work with that I sponsor, I I I require that they take step three with me for two reasons.
Number one, if they take it with me, I know they have taken it. That's the only way I know for sure. But the real reason is is every time we do it together, it means more to me and it has more strength and more power for myself.
I think it's a great idea. Let's take about a 15minute break and we're going to jump right into step four. See you in a little bit.
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