“Only Group Of People To Lie To Our Psychiatrist”😂😂 AA Speaker – Charlie P.
AA speaker Charlie P. discusses why alcoholics lie to doctors and psychiatrists, and how honest self-awareness becomes the foundation for connecting with others in recovery.
Charlie P., with 28 years sober, uses humor to expose a hard truth: alcoholics are willing to pay psychiatrists $200 an hour just to lie about their drinking. In this AA speaker tape, he connects that pattern of dishonesty to what the Big Book says about the power of identification—and why being “properly armed with the facts about himself” is what actually helps one alcoholic reach another.
AA speaker Charlie P. explores why alcoholics deceive mental health professionals about their drinking despite paying for professional help, drawing from Big Book passages about dishonesty and self-deception. He contrasts this pattern with the principle of identification—how an alcoholic with honest self-awareness can reach another alcoholic in a way therapists and doctors cannot. Charlie illustrates this principle through stories of instant recognition and connection at AA conferences, showing that honest self-knowledge is what builds genuine fellowship.
Episode Summary
Charlie P. opens with a direct observation that cuts to the heart of alcoholic behavior: we’ll pay professionals good money and lie to them the entire time. He paints a vivid picture—the psychiatrist asks “Do you drink?” and suddenly the story changes. What’s actually a morning routine of a case of beer and a half gallon of vodka becomes “maybe a couple of beers if I’m mowing the yard.” The absurdity lands because it’s true for so many people. We construct narratives about our drinking that bear almost no resemblance to reality, even in settings where honesty would actually help us.
But Charlie doesn’t stop there. He pulls from the Big Book to show why this matters beyond just being funny. The text says that even wives, parents, and intimate friends often can’t reach us. We push away the people closest to us. Yet—and here’s the turning point—the AA speaker or recovered alcoholic “properly armed with the facts about himself” can win the confidence of another alcoholic in a few hours. That’s not because of credentials or training. It’s because of honest self-knowledge.
The key, Charlie emphasizes, is understanding. Until that understanding is reached—until we’re willing to tell the truth about what we actually did—nothing gets accomplished. No recovery, no connection, no real change. The psychiatrist might have a degree on the wall, but they can’t bridge that gap because we won’t let them see us. The person in AA who knows themselves honestly can.
Charlie then shares a game he and his wife (who has 29 years sober) play at conferences. When someone picks them up at the airport, Charlie makes a prediction: “I’m going to come down the escalator, and I’ll just point. Don’t even tell me who you are. Just be in baggage claim.” And without fail, he can spot his ride. Why? Identification. There’s something unmistakable about a person in recovery. You recognize your own. It’s not words—it’s presence, it’s that honest self-knowledge made visible.
This AA speaker tape is really about the paradox at the heart of recovery: we have to become brutally honest with ourselves before we can genuinely connect with anyone else. That honesty is what opens the door. That’s what makes fellowship possible.
Notable Quotes
We got to be the only group of people that will go to a psychiatrist and pay them $200 an hour and lie to them the whole time.
The ex-pro drinker who has found this solution, who’s properly armed with the facts about himself, can generally win the entire confidence of another alcoholic in a few hours.
Until such an understanding is reached, little or nothing can be accomplished.
There’s something that happens. You come down the escalator and you look around and you go, ‘There’s our boy right there.’
Topics Covered in This Transcript
- Big Book Study
- Honesty
- Denial
- Fellowship & Meetings
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▶ Full AA Speaker Transcript
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We got to be the only group of people that will go to a psychiatrist and pay them $200 an hour and lie to them the whole time. You know, I mean, if they say, "Do you drink?" I mean, I'm not going to go, "Yeah, I like to get a case of beer and a half gallon of vodka in the mornings and just see what the day brings after that, you know? I mean, I'm going to I'm going to say, you know, maybe a couple of beers if I'm mowing the yard or something, you know, like like I've mowed the yard lately, you know.
I mean, but but it's it goes on to say, "Wives, parents, and intimate friends even find us uh more unapproachable than do the the psychiatrist and the doctor." But here's where it gets interesting. It says, "But the ex-pro drinker who has found this solution, who's properly armed with the facts about himself, can generally win the entire confidence of another alcoholic in a few hours." And there's what the key line is right here. It says until such an understanding is reached, little or nothing can be accomplished.
So what did it say? It's saying until that understanding is reached, we're really not going anywhere. I mean, you know, there's something that happens.
And and it's funny. My wife and I are both My wife's I told you she's got 29 years. I got 28.
But we both are very fortunate. We get to go around to a lot of conferences and stuff. And one of my favorite little games that we play is wherever we're going, they'll usually send somebody to come pick you up.
And you know, and you're talking to the guy and you know, and Scott says, "Hey, I'm going to come pick you up at the airport." And I and he, you know, he'll they'll always go, "I'm about five." And don't even tell me. Don't even tell me. Just be in baggage claim.
It's a little thing I like to do. And it's this identification, you know, and I can't tell you how many times I've come down the escalator and you come down into the baggage claim area and you look around and you go, "There's our boy right there."