“Don’t Use Your Plan” – AA Speaker – Scott R.
AA speaker Scott R. shares why he showed up to his first meeting hating everything about it — and why newcomers with plans should listen to someone who’s been there.
Scott R. walked into his first AA meeting in the San Fernando Valley convinced he’d hit rock bottom in the worst possible place. In this AA speaker tape, he doesn’t sugarcoat his early days in the program — the resistance, the judgment, the sheer bewilderment of finding himself in a room full of people he wanted nothing to do with. What kept him coming back had nothing to do with the furniture or the people’s miracles. It was simpler than that: he was out of plans.
Scott R. recounts his first AA meeting with raw, comedic honesty, describing his initial revulsion at the program and the people in it. He explains why he kept coming back despite hating everything about AA — because his own plans had failed completely and he had nowhere else to go. Scott’s central message to newcomers is direct: don’t trust your plan; grab someone in the program and ask for help instead.
Episode Summary
Scott R. walks into Unit A, a 7:00 a.m. meeting in the San Fernando Valley, already on court-ordered probation and deeply skeptical of everything he’s about to encounter. He’s not there because he wants to be. He’s there because the court says so, and he’s written bad checks and needs to show up and take drug tests. He takes one look around the room and his internal response is instant: this is the lamest place on earth. Beyond church, beyond synagogue — a plateau of lameness he never knew existed. Everything about it repels him: the people look identical to him, the furniture, the constant talk of miracles, the earnestness he finds unbearable.
Then comes the unsolicited information guy at the end of the meeting — the one in the belt buckle large enough to serve a whole fish on — asking if Scott wants what he’s got. The answer is no. But something happens after that rejection. Scott comes back. Not once. Every morning for a year.
This is where the talk pivots, and Scott gets honest about why. He had no other plan. That’s it. He wasn’t converted. He didn’t suddenly see the light or feel the fellowship. He was out of plans. His own strategies — the schemes, the justifications, the ways he’d tried to manage his drinking on his own — had all collapsed. There was nothing left in his toolbox.
That’s the whole message, and it’s delivered with brutal clarity: if you’re new and you still have a plan, you’re in danger. Your plan probably looks really good to you right now. It’s probably a beaut. But Scott’s message is a direct one: don’t use it. Grab one of the people in the room after the meeting and tell them your plan instead. Let them poke holes in it. Let the program work on your confidence in your own thinking.
This talk lands hard for anyone early in sobriety still convinced they can figure this out themselves. Scott doesn’t sell AA or recovery like it’s aspirational. He sells it like it’s what happens when you’ve got nothing left. That’s the actual pitch, and it’s more honest than most AA speaker tapes you’ll hear. He stayed because he was out of options, and that’s a reason that works.
Notable Quotes
If you’re new here, I pray for you that you’re out of plans. If you’re new here and you have a plan, it’s probably a beaut. Don’t use your plan.
I hated everything about it. Absolutely everything about it. I went back to that meeting every morning for a year. And the only thing I can come up with is that I was just out of plans.
This is like beyond lame. This is beyond church, beyond synagogue. This is some plateau of lameness I never even imagined was available to me.
Grab one of us after the meeting and tell us your plan.
Topics Covered in This Transcript
- Early Sobriety
- Willingness
- Denial
- Humor in Recovery
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▶ Full AA Speaker Transcript
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So, I go to the AA meeting. I don't know why. It's a mystery to me.
I go to a place called Unit A in the San Fernando Valley. 7:00 a.m. meeting.
Got my best clothes on. Got a bad check to write you. Showing up to pee in a cup.
At that meeting, you actually could have peed in the cup. Anybody's cup at that meeting, by the And I I take one step in, I look around, and I go, "Oh my god, how did I wind up in Alcoholics Anonymous? This is like beyond lame.
This is beyond church, beyond synagogue. This is some plateau of lameness I never even imagined was available to me. Alcoholics Anonymous." And the room looked like it's the product of 200 years of inbreeding.
Easy. Easy. They're like identical twins carving their initials on each other's feet in the back of the room.
Or so it seems to me. And everything's a miracle. "I'm a miracle.
You're a miracle. Miracle. Miracle.
Miracle." "This furniture is a miracle." And I'm waiting for the Jew hunt to start. I know that's going to break out, right? Come on, Strap these antlers on.
Yiddle diddle diddle. Oh, man. Always wanted to run a dick buck Jew.
And uh and then the AA unsolicited information guy, he got me at the end of the meeting. You know him. He's wearing a belt buckle large enough to serve an entire fish on.
Do I want what you've got? No. No, but thanks for spitting on me, Clyde.
I really appreciate it. Really appreciate it. I'll show up next week.
Are we going to hook a rug? Do I bring my own bib overalls? Am I issued a pair?
What's the next move, Clyde? Talk to me, baby. I I hated everything about it.
Absolutely everything about it. I went back to that meeting every morning for a year. And the only thing I can come up with is that I was I was just out of plans.
Just out of plans. If you're new here, I pray for you that you're out of plans. If you're new here and you have a plan, it's probably a beaut.
Don't use your plan. Grab one of us after the meeting and tell us your plan.