“Better Get Your Happy Ass Out of Here” 😂AA Speaker – Bobby C.
AA speaker Bobby C. shares his story of joining the Philadelphia Police Department at 21 and spiraling into alcoholism while working in North Philadelphia. A talk about hitting bottom and finding recovery.
Bobby C. from Philadelphia got hired by the police department at 21 and spent years drinking to numb the trauma he witnessed on the job in North Philadelphia. In this AA speaker tape, he opens up about the disconnect between the cop he thought he was supposed to be and the man he was actually becoming—and the moment that forced him to look at himself honestly.
Bobby C., a Philadelphia police officer, describes his early career in law enforcement during the 1970s under Mayor Frank Rizzo, when he and his fellow officers could act with near-total impunity. He details how he began drinking heavily to cope with the trauma and pain of witnessing addiction and violence daily, while hiding his own struggles from his colleagues to maintain his image as “one of the boys.” This AA speaker talk reveals how the culture of his department and his own denial kept him trapped in alcoholism until he was forced to confront his behavior and seek recovery.
Episode Summary
Bobby C. starts his story at a pivotal moment—a day when his happiness got him ejected from a stadium by a Philadelphia police lieutenant who, without realizing it, may have saved his life. That officer’s intervention kept Bobby from getting beaten or arrested, something that would have derailed his path just weeks before he was about to land a job with the Philadelphia Police Department.
Bobby got hired into the department during an era when the force was massive and powerful under Mayor Frank Rizzo, a former police commissioner who championed his officers. With 8,300 cops on the payroll and an almost untouchable status in the city, Bobby and his fellow officers operated with a freedom that bred recklessness. He was barely old enough to drink when he was sworn in—Pennsylvania’s legal drinking age was 21—but once he had his badge, the restrictions fell away.
The real part of his story emerges when he describes his early years working the streets of North Philadelphia. Every shift, he witnessed the ravages of addiction and alcoholism. He saw people destroyed by drugs and alcohol, saw the aftermath of what the disease does to families and communities. But like many police officers who encounter trauma and suffering daily, Bobby didn’t have anywhere safe to process it. He couldn’t talk to his co-workers about what he was seeing and feeling because he didn’t want to be seen as weak or soft—he wanted to be “one of the boys.”
So he drank. After every tour, he’d go out with guys from his squad and drink to numb the pain. The drinking wasn’t social—it was medicinal, a way to quiet the things he’d witnessed that day that he couldn’t talk about. But drinking to numb trauma creates its own problems. Over time, Bobby found himself engaging in behaviors he knew were wrong. The way he treated people on the job, the way he spoke to them—he knew it wasn’t right, but he kept doing it anyway. He was immature, he was nuts, he was living a lie.
The culture of the department reinforced it all. When your workplace tells you that you’re untouchable, that you can do whatever you want, it’s easy to believe it. And if you’re already drinking to cope with trauma, that environment becomes toxic. This is where Bobby’s story picks up—a man in uniform, caught between the officer he thought he needed to be and the person he was actually becoming, with alcohol as the fuel that kept him running on that painful contradiction.
Notable Quotes
I’m just happy to be here” — the simple truth that got him thrown out of the stadium
I would see the ravages of alcoholism and drug addiction day in day out. And at the end of the tour, I will go out with guys in the squad and drink to numb the pain.
I couldn’t tell my co-workers that because I didn’t want to be thought less than. I wanted to be one of the boys.
I engaged in behaviors I knew was wrong. The way I treated the people and spoke to people, you know, but I was just nuts. I was immature.
Topics Covered in This Transcript
- Hitting Bottom
- Early Sobriety
- Denial
- Anger
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Just as I was about to get my beaten Philadelphia police lieutenant showed up. He said, "What's the matter with you?" He said, "Are you drunk? Are you h you high?
What's what's going on?" I said, "I'm just happy. I'm just happy to be here." He said, "Well, you're going to get your happy ass out of the stadium." So, not only did he save me from getting a beaten, but he saved me from getting arrested. And that was kind of important because about like 6, eight weeks later, one of them civil service am kind of panned out and I got hired by the Philadelphia Police Department.
They was hiring anybody back then. Take my word. I got hired.
We had a our mayor at the time was a guy by the name of Frank Rizzo and Frank was a former cop and police commissioner. He loved us and we were 8,300 strong and we were nothing but gang badges and we could do whatever the hell we want to do. When I got sworn in, I'm not even old enough to drink.
The drinking age in the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania has always been 21. At that time, the drinking age in Jersey was 18. And where I lived in Philly, I could be across the bridge in Jersey quicker than other parts of Philadelphia, you know, but once I got on the job, I no longer needed to do that, you know, and uh I was off to the races.
The first part of my career, I spent up in North Philadelphia, and I would see the uh the ravages of alcoholism and drug addiction day in day out. And at the end of the tour, I will go out with guys in the squad and drink to numb the pain because I saw things on the job, but I couldn't tell my co-workers that because I didn't want to be thought less than. I wanted to be one of the boys to the point where I engaged in behaviors I knew was wrong.
The way I treated the people and spoke to people, you know, but I was just nuts. I was immature, you know.